Good lawd, get me out of this place!

Shhhh...listen.... can you hear that? Listen closely! It's the sound of the life being sucked right out of me!

Whatever. I'm going to drink my Pepsi, fondle my breasts and play with my hair. That should occupy most of my time for the morning. Oh, and do a little work. But I stress the little part. This weekend should be weird. I don't know if my car's going into the shop or not. I think it's going TO the shop, but it can't get fixed for at least another week. And then there's the whole insurance hassle. I swear, get me in the room with that broad and i'll make her 'fess up about the lies she's telling. Bitch! My insurance goes up because she lies, yet I can't contest it? Haha. They don't know me. I can contest things with a look. I've perfected uber-bitchy Queen contesting with my stupid cow head. Cow head. Yep. Someone called me pretty girl the other day. I wish I knew how to take a compliment. I said, "me?"

Ok.

Enjoy your two days of freedom!

We aren't in Cansas anymore I'm out.

anxiety attack

today is not such a good day

I hate you and you and you and you and especially you.

It sounds so cliche, but I need a new life. Something totally different. I'm sick of sitting in this chair, in this room, with these people...in this building. I'm tired of my neighborhood and my furniture and my fucking face. I feel the need to sit somewhere quiet...where there's water...and just be still. (but I did get my new Radiohead today-free is good)

I feel like puking right now.

I wish I could change my mood with a potion, like Jekyll and Hyde sorta thing. Knowing my luck I'd be stuck as Hyde!
Feeling this depressed makes me sick.
I want to go away.
The end.

What about you?

Are you hungry?
Are you sick?
Are you begging for a break?
Are you sweet?
Are you fresh?
Are you strung up by the wrists?
(Fois-gras style)
We want the young blood.
Are you fracturing?
Are you torn at the seams?
Would you do anything?
Flea-bitten? Motheaten?
We suck young blood like Dracula.
Won't let the creeping ivy
Won't let the nervous bury me
Our veins are thin
Our rivers poisoned
We want the sweet meats.
We want the young blood.
We suck young blood.
We want the young blood.
next
-rh

It feels like i've done a lot of work on this site

I mean the basic template is not mine and I can't code for the life of me, but I know enough to fumble around a bit and change colors and stuff. So I tried to make it look more like me. I think it looks pretty nice so far. How industrious of me. Haha.

And all of this has been done at work. Well, everyone here can kiss my fat, white ass...i've sweated blood for this company in the past and i've been slapped in the face lately. So hey, if they consider me one thing and they're used to having me be so much more and get paid the same, then they can get what they pay for. I'll be their glorified "data entry supervisor". But hey, if i'm too smart for this position and get my work down tres fast, then fuck'em if I play around on line a bit. Pay me a little more, treat me with respect and give me work that uses my brain and I don't have a problem being the ideal employee. But the slap in the face? Not such a good thing.

Other than that, life is just a big bowl of warm crap. The car problems never end...the landlords are complaining about my cat's "smell"....hello, they're pets. They smell different. So I went and bought carpet deodorizer and uber cleaned the litter box and vacuumed the hell out of the rug. I hope they just shut up now. I mean, they're great people and all, but it's ALWAYS something. Let it go. Christ.

Sorry God I promise to read The Proverbs when I get home later.

I'm stressed, so I tend to listen to sad, melancholy music. Or country. Or both.

My fave picks right now:

-Kenny Chesney
-Bruce Springsteen
-Radiohead
-Stereophonics
-Kissing Jessica Stein

Ok, now i'm rambling, feel like I'm stuck in a bad book or something :-)

*poof*

Great Bloggers

There are some very exceptional people in the Blog world. I'm starting to branch out and read a few more sites here and there and i've been pleasantly surprised. For some reason i'm reading a lot of stuff from New Yorkers. It's not entirely surprising to me. I had an on-line "love affair" with a guy from Connecticut that was born in Brooklyn. He had a lingering east coast accent that I always thought was intriguing and a little sexy. (I have a thing for that machismo-don't ask)

I'm struggling with finding a template that I actually like. This one seems to have clean lines and a basic format. I think I will stick with it and see if I can not change it just because I can.

The weather here is gorgeous. I'm trying VERY hard to not mourn my car's illness right now. It's difficult...I so want to roll the windows down, turn the music up and put my new sunglasses on. But alas, my car needs an operation and I can't afford it right now. It breaks my heart. My car seems to be the thing I like most in my life. I know that sounds sad, but it's true. She's my baby. Ok, try to not puke over that last statement. So, i'm back on the bus. The Sars express. I try not thinking about people touching every inch of seat or handle or bar. It's a breeding ground for disease. But at least it's there. I would be screwed without it.

Ok, I need to do some work. I've been interupted non-stop this afternoon and I don't feel like i've accomplished a damn thing.

Ta Ta

I haven't had a lot to say lately

mainly because i've been doing jack shit. That's what having a week off from work is for though I suppose.

Things I did do though

-saw the Matrix-Reloaded (cool special effects, stunned-Keanu Reeves)

-drove up the Sea-to-Sky highway in the rain, had lunch there with a friend, bought a cool pair of sunglasses for $3

-saw Coldplay and the Music
Wow
WoW
what a great show

-cleaned a LOT of junk out of my storage room
(now I need to find the energy to organize the pit from hell)

-got a breast infection, again...yay!

-decided that I need to find a hobby to occupy my over-active brain, maybe some kind of puzzle activity or cooking, found a site with thousands of recipes that might be fun.

-fell out of love with almost all of my friends.

-have spent some time reading the Bible not sure it's for me though.

Dude, you so rocked the mic like a vandal

Ok, i'm starting to feel the "I'm so close to being on vacation" vibe that it's not even funny, I'd kill to visit Naples this year, but going to a place like Naples is too costly right now. Maybe it's because I have a little coin in my pocket. Yay! I've been uber-broke for the past two weeks. Trying to get my shit together and get out of debt is hard work, you eat a lot of popcorn and your cats hate you because they don't get enough treats. But it's worth it when you have more than two pennies to rub together when you get your paycheque. Hell, I COULD put all of it on bills, but i'm going to buy some groceries and go see a couple of movies for a change. What's the point of working hard if you can't at least treat yourself to some food in your cupboards. Haha.

And, I bought a Ralph Wiggum lighter this morning at the gas station. I'm such a geek and I SO DON'T smoke. Haha. But it will come in handy for other things, I'm sure.

Other than that, today is fairly uneventful. I would like to score a movie pass to see Bruce Almighty though....so I think i'll make some calls. And i'm really enjoying Blogger so far. I'm not very good at this html/programming/code/script thing, but i'm learning. You all have such cool and interesting blogs....I'm super-loving reading them. Last night I spent at least an HOUR reading two of them. Two! And I hadn't laughed that hard for a long time.

I should get back to work.

Cha cha

Just another day in a long series of boring days

I think I need to shake things up, or have someone shake them up for me.

It's been so quiet and uneventful that I wonder if i'm actually alive. Just going through the motions. My life sure isn't an episode of Fear Factory i'll tell you that much.

Maybe I should quit bitching though. A lot of people have it worse than I do. Boredom isn't necessarily a bad thing when you can compare it to the thousands of other things that are pretty shitty to have to deal with.

And hey, tomorrow's pay day and this weekend is a long one and I have next week off. Maybe it's not so bad after all.

Been reading Power of Movement in Plants by Darwin didn't realise he wrote more than that evolution book.